


Mutually Assured Destruction

by orphan_account



Category: Callan (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, New Hunter, Season/Series 02 Spoilers, Sexual Content, Train journey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-01
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-03-20 17:38:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3659235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Callan discovers Toby's secret. What will he do with it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mutually Assured Destruction

**Author's Note:**

> Heavy spoilers for series 2 episode 6, Heir Apparent. Also a glimpse into my headcanon on Toby's personal life.

It was the way he said it that made Toby suspicious, "I am sorry about Gould, he was a good agent."

And Callan was looking directly at Toby when he uttered these words. He hoped that Callan would keep the information to himself. It was bad enough having an angry, distant father who did not approve of anything he did including his going to the movies whenever he could since he was 18. He was always discrete and careful that no one saw him.

He hadn't spoken to his father after coming back home from school abruptly a few weeks before his last semester was over after Michael's suicide. His friendship with Michael was the only time Toby had allowed himself to become close to someone.

His army years reminded him too much of the strict harshness of his school and the regular beatings from the boys (though in his last year he had taught a lot of them a lesson). He felt an immense sense of relief when he was finally kicked out of the army for an altercation which lead to an officer's death. He didn't even know what the officer's name was, he thought and he didn't care. He felt nothing about his death except an immense sense of power over another human being when he pressed the trigger. It was a high he had never experienced before.

He had never told his father about the young men he met, not even when they met briefly to discuss how to settle the murder charges out of court. He had never told anyone. Emotions were a sign of weakness and a split second of weakness made all the difference in who lived and who died in their profession, his instructor at the training college had told him. It was a dangerous game they played and it was an even dangerous one that he was playing on the side. He had hoped that no one would find out. The worse thing would be losing his job in the Section, he didn't care about anything else.

Callan now possessed that information. He would not have kept quiet if he had been in Callan's shoes. Toby was the only one who was almost as good as Callan at this job. You need skill and a cool head to make it here and you have to be mad to want to stay in this job. Callan could probably make Hunter easily, Toby thought, He has all the skills, yet I have all the ambition. He thought of all the others that hadn't made it and then his mind drifted to Gould. Gould had graduated among the top in his class but he still had a lot to learn. He shrugged and thought, the silly fool.

They were to travel to East Germany in a couple of hours to bring the new Hunter back home. The Defence Secretary had just finished briefing them about the fact that the new Hunter was in charge of the network of spies in East Germany and could not come through normal channels and required their assistance. The head of the war office had explained the mines they would have to cross to reach the place where Hunter would be hiding. Toby and Callan had not been very pleasant to the General.

'I'm sure the General appreciated our manners,' Toby had joked after the General had left.

Toby was surprised at the uneasy camaraderie that was beginning to develop between him and Callan. He had still not forgiven Callan for knocking him cold and letting him be arrested after Schneider's case and for putting him in hospital just because he had taught that silly little bastard Lonely a lesson. But then Callan was different than all the other agents. He hated his job for one and worried about the people he had killed. He even cared about that smelly creature, Lonely. What was the point?

It was true that Callan had been in a strange mood ever since the death of Hunter a couple of weeks ago; cold and distant and warm and friendly at one and the same time. Toby didn't understand what all the fuss was about. People die all the time. Nobody's worth crying over. Everyone you meet is always such a disappointment, anyway.

They were travelling to Leipzig via Munich, Vienna, Salzberg and Paris. It had taken them several hours just to reach the Italian frontier. Toby was woken up by the ticket collector at the door of their compartment asking for passports and tickets in Italian. Callan was already awake from his uneasy slumber. Once the ticket collector had left, they looked at each other.

Toby didn't know what to say. He couldn't forget that look. Callan stared at Toby again with the exact same look for a split second before he started talking about the man they were going to rescue.

'You'll like old John Ramsey, you would.' Callan told him.

'Hunter, old boy, Hunter from now on or sir if you'd prefer.  How did you know him?'

'How do you think I knew John 'public school' Ramsey? John 'public school' Ramsey followed me around the field learning the ropes for six months. He may not have been very good but at least he knew he'd have a cushy number waiting for him.  He had one talent though, he was a natural when it came to shooting.'

'We're all the same in the top drawer, old boy. It's the grouse.'

There fell an awkward silence between them.

Toby gulped and took a deep breath,"Callan...."

"12 hours from Paris another 12 to Salzberg from Vienna, It's right old gag isn't it, old boy?" his mouth formed the words. He couldn't say it. He couldn't say what was on his mind.

"Well, we'd be stupid to not take the necessary precautions." Callan answered back gruffly.

Toby closed his eyes for a moment only to feel Callan standing close by.

"Callan," he began again.

"Shhh..." Callan said placing his finger on Toby's lips and kissing his cheeks softly. He then kissed him on the lips. The kiss which lingered on his lips was soft and gentle which made it all the more unexpected coming from Callan. Toby kissed him back tasting his tongue in his mouth.

'You surprise me, Toby,' Callan said unbuttoning Toby's shirt and kissing his neck and then slowly moving down.

'You're not so bad yourself, David.'

'Shut up,' Callan hissed.

They undid each other's trousers in a mad fury of haste as if the few moments was all the time in the world that they had. Callan's touch felt oddly satisfying and he moaned in pain and ecstasy as Callan's fingers and mouth worked on him. Toby was efficient but he was surprised to note how good Callan was in bed. He knew every move before Toby made it. The sex, when they had it, was different than what Toby was used to, with his young trainees who were often hesitant to try new positions or take the lead. Callan was the same in bed as he was in the field: Passionate, ruthless and eager. 

One other thing that Callan is great at, Toby thought. 

'I can finally say I held your balls in my hand David, if anyone asks.'

'You and your jokes Toby, they never get better do they?'

The scenes shifted past the windows and they were passing through Austria now. The ticket collector was doing his rounds again. Quietly they dressed and sat on opposite seats, facing away from each other.

"Mutually assured destruction," Callan whispered as Toby smiled.

They were strangers and colleagues who hated each other once again and none of them would ever mention it in passing, not even to themselves. Toby would not even allow himself to think or feel anything about it. But as their eyes met before Callan was about to cross the field littered with mines to rescue Hunter, they both nodded at each other. They would know and that was enough.


End file.
